Do not adjust your browsers… I’m on vacation without my kids!! Being in Maui gave me lots of time to do things that bring me joy, and to reflect on how important it is to work those things in to what little free time I have when I’m home being mom. Time is your most precious resource. We didn’t have to be so intentional about how we spent it before we had kids, cause we had lots of it! But it’s a different ball game now. What brings you joy? If you can bring a little more of that into your life, you’ll be one happy mom!
I keep hearing about this concept of a “good enough mom,” but I’m never able to buy in. I just keep looking around and seeing other moms doing stuff with their kids that I never do, and I feel like I’m not giving my kids what they need to succeed in life. How do I know if I’m doing enough?
Lisa M.
Lisa,
I have a neighbor who is a total fitness nut. While my kids and I are on the front lawn staring at snails or describing animals we see in the clouds (read: sedentary), she’s mountain-biking or power-walking by with her kids in tow. Whenever I see her, the feeling creeps up: Why don’t I do more physical activity with the kids? She’s a much better mom than me. Now, I could choose to use this opportunity to feel awful about myself, but instead, I’ve learned to embrace this fact: We are all individuals, and our parenting styles are driven by our unique interests, strengths, talents and passions. For example, I love cooking with my kids and as a result, they’re adventurous with food. My 4 year old asked for extra basil on her grilled zucchini the other night, and my 8 year old makes really good salad dressing from scratch.
I think the “good enough mom” idea is well-intentioned: it helps moms realize that they don’t have to be perfect to raise happy children. The problem is, I don’t know a single mom who enjoys describing herself that way! Instead, I like to promote the idea of “true to you mom,” where you live by the passions, talents and interests that you have, and celebrate how those things get modeled to your children. Do more of what you love, then notice how interactions with your kids are affected. Those are the moments that make you so much more than “good enough.”
I love Carley’s wisdom. Her advice resonated with me in a deep way. I know that her suggestions are exactly what I must do to be successful and have balance. From her advice, I am looking at how to set boundaries, and be intentional and disciplined with my time for work, and time for family. She reminded me that my time is finite, so I don’t want to let my work time bleed into my family time… which I tend to do! — Melissa Taylor, Writer & Educator, Imagination Soup
