If you could give advice to your pregnant, pre-kid self, what would you say?
During the summer I spent in the Great White North, I had the opportunity to be involved in a photo-shoot-turned-tear-jerker video project that asked that very question. When I smiled and held up my card, I had no idea what a powerful message would result when all our collective wisdom was strung together with music. Check out this beautiful video, masterminded by Scott Stratten from Unmarketing and Alison Kramer from Nummies. Thanks so much for including me. It was so fun to be a part of it!
If you could go back and talk to your pregnant self, what would you say? Let me know in comments!
Laura Vanderkam wants to help you make more of your week. In our time-starved, crazybusy world, she’s uncovered a truth that is sometimes hard to swallow— we have plenty of time for the things that are important to us, we just suck at using our time well.
Yikes.
In 168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think, Vanderkam makes her case gently yet powerfully— we all could be a lot better about identifying what’s important to us and making time to do it. I sat down with her for an interview where she shares how the successful among us make better use of the 168 hours dispensed to all of us, and how we cane employ some of their best practices.
Last month’s Mompod was great– we blew through so many productivity secrets, and my motivated moms have already reported a LOT of life changes as a result! Kids were playing, moms were relaxing over a beautiful fruit platter (thank you, fabulous Treehouse Social Club!), and a good time was had by all.
This month, it’s not just about how to be more productive— we’re tackling those projects and tasks that you just. can’t. get. done. I’ll share techniques for how to properly break down and conquer any project or task that has been eluding you. Come hang with me and other amazing women as we talk life, family, career… and how to keep them all afloat!
It all happens Wednesday, June 16th, 10:00-11:30AM at the Treehouse Social Club, a hipster indoor playplace in Beverly Hills, so you can bring tykes and they’ll be plenty busy while we talk shop.
Pricing: $20 for YOU + 1 tyke, $5 for every extra child.
(If you’re a member of First Tuesday, an amazing community and professional networking organization, you get a discount).
Space is limited, so email me if you’d like to join us, and I’ll reserve a spot for you!
Mompods are my first order of business as a new leadership member with First Tuesday, a national organization of phenomenal women. DEFINITELY check out their website for more information— this is an amazing group to join, whether you’re new in town, want to do some professional networking, or want to find fun ways to “give back”. I’m proud to be working with them!
What makes you feel confident and downright pretty? iVillage and Fotobabble want to know, and you can share a talking picture with them to spill your secrets! Enter before June 30 and you could win a $500 gift basket from Sephora! Here’s me, sharing what makes me feel the most beautiful and confident.
Los Angeles moms, I’m starting an awesome monthly event that I want you to be a part of! Come hang with me and other amazing women as we talk life, family, career… and how to keep them all afloat! I’ll be hosting the first “Mompod” on May 21st, 10:00-11:30AM at the Treehouse Social Club, a hip-and-cool indoor playplace in Beverly Hills, so you can bring tykes and they’ll be plenty busy while we talk shop. $15 gets you admission plus 1 child, and bring extra kids for $7 each. This month, I’ll be talking about my biggest TIME MANAGEMENT secrets— spend 90 minutes with me at the Mompod and I’ll help you earn even MORE time back with everything you learn!
Space is limited, so email me if you’d like to join us, and I’ll reserve a spot for you.
Mompods are my first order of business as a new leadership member with First Tuesday, a national organization of phenomenal women. DEFINITELY check out their website for more information— this is an amazing group to join, whether you’re new in town, want to do some professional networking, or want to find fun ways to “give back”. I’m proud to be working with them!
Everything’s great right now, right? Your husband’s a good guy, kids are healthy, there’s food on the table, and the house is clean enough so that no one sees the mess. You should be so happy.
So why are you so frustrated and upset all the time?
Don’t you know how lucky you are to have all these choices? That you’re able to pursue work or stay home if you want to? No matter that it feels impossible to keep up, and like everyone else is doing it better. There’s probably something wrong with you, and it’s better just to keep working at being “better”.
Maybe if you enrolled the kids in that karate class, or got that cute stroller, or picked up the toys more, or bought a sexy nursing bra, or lost 15 pounds, or started a meditation practice, or did more volunteer work, or learned how to use your digital camera, or started buying more organic groceries you’d feel like other people thought you were a better mom, and that might make you feel better. If you need more ideas on how to improve, I’ll supply you with them throughout the day and night. Happy to help.
Speaking of help, shouldn’t you know how to do this motherhood thing without assistance? Look around— so many of your friends are doing just fine on their own. Don’t bother anyone by asking them to share the load. You don’t want anyone to know you’re struggling, do you? You might as well tattoo “failure” on your forehead!
And what’s with all the forgetfulness, the missed meetings, the tardiness and the broken promises? Some people say you’re trying to do too much, but you and I both know that the more you “do” for your kids, the better a mother you’ll be, right?
Lastly, and I’ve told you this before, there is simply no time for your hobbies or passions right now. How are you going to be a good mom to your kids when you’re off taking time for yourself, enjoying life, feeding your soul and nurturing your marriage and friendships? How selfish! No, all your thoughts and energy should be directed at your kids, and if you’re not working, you should be right there with them.
Oh, and you should really question what kind of mother you are if all of this isn’t fulfilling you— this is what you were born to do, so you better figure out how to enjoy it!
Thanks for listening (not that you have a choice). It’s my job to remind you how crappy you are at being a mom. Remember: Don’t ask for help and don’t look beyond motherhood for more. You’ll be able to rediscover yourself in, like, 18 years or so. You can wait ’til then, right?
With love and unrelenting criticism,
Your inner-voice.
I had the idea to write this email last night as I put the finishing touches on the Perfect Moms Finish Last 6-Week course, which starts tonight. I don’t know a mom who doesn’t talk to herself like this: It’s so corrosive and only serves to push us down, rather than help us identify out our obstacles and overcome them. Yet we all do it— we’re all so comfortable beating ourselves down, we don’t even need anyone else to help us out?
If you’re feeling like it’s time to put an end to this self-talk madness and really, REALLY get a handle on your life, it’s not too late to register for the course.There’s just one spot left, and I want it to be yours. After that, you’ll miss this opportunity to get all the nuts-and-bolts systems I teach to transform your life and help you take control, as well as the remedies for your Perfect Mom Disorder.
Don’t let Mrs. Inner Voice talk you out of it. NOW is the time to invest in yourself— your family will benefit tenfold from the improvements you make to your life.
Cool Mom Picks, arbiter of all things indie/eco/uber chic for baby, has a great post today about Perfect Moms Finish Last. Liz Gumbinner, editor of CMP, was also a Perfect Moms Finish Last Interviewee, and you can listen to her amazing interview along with 19 others by signing up here. We talk about everything from Bugaboo backlash, to all the crap you don’t need to buy when you have a baby, to how she’s a “Type A woman, but a Type B mom.” (How does that work, anyway?) She was GREAT to talk to, and for someone who has had a pretty impressive career in advertising before heading to the interwebs, she was very down to earth (the tagline for her personal blog, Mom 101 reads, “I don’t know what I’m doing either.” Now THAT’S someone who has her Perfect Mom Disorder under control!)
Early registration prices for the course end at midnight TONIGHT, so if you’re thinkin’ you need to get a handle on your Perfect Mom Disorder, if you’re exhausted trying to keep up appearances and your search for that ever-elusive “balance,” jump in and be a part of this very intimate, very small 6-Week course.
“Hey Carley, is this Perfect Moms Finish Last 6-week Course a lot of motivational, inspirational hoo hah fluff? Or is it actually going to help me get my life and schedule under control and help me remember to get the milk?!”
Many of you have been asking me this same question, and it’s a good one— no one could argue that being a fulfilled, satisfied, happy mom is a good thing for everyone, but sometimes you’re not in the living-a-strong-life kind of place.
Sometimes, you’re just in the please-lord-let-me-make-it-through-dinner place. What you need then are solutions, not mommy mantras or inspirational tips.
Perfect Moms Finish Last gives you BOTH inspiration and practical systems in a nice little 6-week package. Because no matter how much “me-time” you’re getting, if you keep showing up late to school pick-up, or missing client calls, or staring at the same pile of dirty laundry for a week and a half, you’re going to feel like a FAILURE. And there’s nothing that sucks more than working as hard as you are only to feel like you’re not measuring up.
It’s time for some brand-new systems that can help you regain control of and simplify your life. Plus the inspirational “hoo hah” that puts you on a path to living a life you feel totally awesome about.
Check out the video above: I break the whole Perfect Moms Finish Last 6-Week course down week-by-week. (It’s a long one, but a goodie!). If you’re feeling like this course might be for you, jump in quick— early registration ends at midnight tomorrow!
If YOU have questions about the course, post them here!
I’m excited to let you know that I will be the guest expert on a call with Momnificent’s Lori Radun on Wednesday, March 3rd at 10:30am PT/ 1:30pm ET. The call is part of her monthly Mom’s Club teleseminar series, which is full of fantastic resources to fuel your personal and professional growth as a mom.
Wednesday’s call is all about LEVERAGE. Because when you’re short on time (that’s all of us) and low on energy (helloooo!), you need to yield big results with little effort. Knowing how to leverage everything from your smartphone to your family members will help you maximize your two most precious resources— time and energy.
In our hour-long gab session, we’ll discuss how to automate, delegate and delete the things in life that drain you, making room for you to be more present with your children and work and have a more joyful life. We’ll tackle the negative mindsets and beliefs that keep people from getting the support they need, and how to overcome them. And we’ll talk about how doing less actually makes you more productive, and the myth of multi-tasking.
To learn more and to register for this teleclass, please visit http://www.tinyurl.com/marchmmc. Momnificent! will send you a reminder with the phone number and access code you will need to join me on this teleclass.
Shel Silverstein was one of my favorite childhood authors.
Even as a kid, I remember thinking that he was a ballsy dude, with his no-color illustrations and his hand-drawn typefaces.
His stories were some of my favorites then, but the themes have revealed themselves to me over the years in ways I couldn’t have understood as a child. Now as a mom, they’re a mirror I can use to examine my own life, and a blueprint for values I want to instill in my children.
One of my favorites then, and still now, is The Missing Piece. You know, the little guy that looks like a pizza pie with a slice missing that goes rolling through life on a quest to find someone to complete him? He has some bad dating experiences along the way— pieces that are too loose and fall out, pieces crack in his too-tight embrace, and a piece that’s too pointy and just plain hurts.
When he finally finds his “perfect fit,” he discovers that “perfection” means he can’t stop to talk to a worm, or smell a flower. He can’t even sing his happy song (because his mouth is full) and he thinks to himself:
“Aha, so that’s how it is.”
The little guy literally has an “Aha moment”. He figures out what so many of us have trouble seeing— that he’s okay the way he is. That within his perfectly-imperfect self lies everything he needs to lead a happy, fulfilled, super-awesome life.
If you’ve tried looking to your husband, your children, your job, your house or your brand-name diaper bag to make you happy, and nothing works, it’s time to look to Shel Silverstein for some guidance.
The Perfect Moms Finish Last 6-Week Course is all about giving you the keys to a life where you feel COMPLETE just as you are, where ALL PARTS of you are expressed and you don’t have to sweep parts of yourself under the rug.
You can talk to the worm AND smell the flower.
This is not about “having it all,” proving to the world that you can do everything so that you’re so exhausted you can barely stand.
It’s about embracing all the parts of you:
The part that wants to stomp in puddles with your kids, to watch worms, to peel off your raincoats, and make hot chocolate with extra marshmallows.
AND
The part that longs to write on a whiteboard, collaborate with colleagues, roll up your sleeves, and feel the thrill of the successful work project.
AND
The part that wants to travel with carry-on luggage only, to read The New Yorker, to put on a pair of skinny jeans and heels, have a beer and discuss politics.
All these parts don’t make you the “Perfect Mom”. They make you perfectly YOU. And if you can embrace who you are, just as you are, you’re on the path to Missing Piece-style fulfillment.
Join me on the preview callTHIS THURSDAY, February 25th at 10am PST/1pm EST, where I’ll be spilling all the details of my 6-week course and opening registration. I can’t wait to finally share the curriculum with you, and help you shed your Perfect Mom Disorder and embrace your multi-dimensional self.
Working with Carley made me highly motivated to continue and build on the work I’ve been doing. I love the way she knows you can do things even when you aren’t sure. Her energy is amazing and yet she has a calming presence at the same time. Her practical approach to getting things done really does allow you to move forward on the things you want to accomplish. — Erin Baebler, Life Coach, The Magnolia Workshop
One of my favorites then, and still now, is The Missing Piece. You know, the little guy that looks like a pizza pie with a slice missing that goes rolling through life on a quest to find someone to complete him? He has some bad dating experiences along the way— pieces that are too loose and fall out, pieces crack in his too-tight embrace, and a piece that’s too pointy and just plain hurts.
